I'm here. I'll always be.

Can you just go ahead and read my "I want you to know" post? Go! Now! Read it before reading this.

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To: You.

You know who you are. I don't even know if you can actually read this because I basically just gave Kenny and Sofie the link to this blog. Someday you will see this if ever I'm courageous enough to even attempt to talk to you about this.

They want me to stop -- to stop whatever it is that's happening between us. It's either you or Ateneo. You or my future. You or my dreams. They said that right now, it can never be an "and" because they speak from experience, it's simply always an "or."

We can't be exclusive to each other. We're not together, as much as we both want to. But it is not healthy for the both of us. It is not healthy for you to subconsciously expect something from someone who really can't give you what you need. I can but, please not me. Please not me. It can be me, but not right now. If we help each other complete ourselves, we're not strong enough to not lose ourselves in the process. We both need the time and space. I know it's overly dramatic but we're falling deeper and deeper into this, this thing that can't happen.

I'm not leaving. This is not me leaving. Nobody is leaving. We're here. We'll always be here for each other. Much like a movie sequel. You know it's coming, but you just have to wait for it. Does that mean you'll love it less? No! Heck nah! I've waited for Monsters University for so long because I fell in love with Monsters, Inc.! I'm never letting go of the thought that the time they're making me wait is for me to grow up, and let them do their own thing and make the sequel perfect for everyone to see. And that creation they're building for me to see contains only things that I would understand if I actually have grown up and have experienced all the things I needed to be able to grasp whatever it has become. It's like I grew up with the movie. It's like we're now both just right at the right time.

I'm sorry. I'm not leaving. I'm here. I'll always be.

And I know you will, too.